TO THE GRIEVING HEART

Sometimes the greatest grief isn’t what you’ve lost; it’s what will never be.

The plans that will never play out, the memories that will never be made.

Learning to let go of what will never be while simultaneously cherishing the moments that were is all a part of the process.

I remember purchasing children’s Bible books in faith for my future children. At that time, my ex and I had started talking about trying to get pregnant. My life’s greatest desire has always been to be a mom, so it was music to my ears to begin having these discussions.

Then the relationship ended…and with it, the possibility of having children together.

I came across the stack of books in my closet one day and a wave of grief hit me for the unmet expectation of those children. Grief is like that. It hits you out of nowhere at times. Certain reminders of what was and what will never be. Can I remind your heart that it’s ok to grieve? It’s ok to let yourself feel the emotions. It’s ok to process it all and cry your eyes out if you need to. That doesn’t mean you are weak. It actually makes you strong!

The Lord put it on my heart to give the books to one of my friends for her newborn child. It was a beautiful juxtaposition to celebrate her miracle baby and the joy she would have in reading those books to him while grieving letting go of the possibility of my own.

Disappointment is real. The Bible says that “hope deferred makes the heart sick” and my many-morning puffy eyes can testify to the truth of that verse in Proverbs 13:12. I know what it’s like to cry myself to sleep. I know what it’s like for the grief wave to hit you like a tsunami and take your breath away. I know what it’s like to feel the stinging pain of loss where it literally feels like your heart is shattered into a million pieces.

But do you know what else I know? The nearness of a relational God who promises to never leave or forsake us. The faithfulness of a loving God who is always close to the broken hearted. The restoration of a redeeming God who works all things together for good. In my greatest moments of weakness when I have felt like grief could literally suck all of the oxygen from my lungs, He has met me there and shown me that His power is truly made perfect in my weakest moments.

So to the heart that is grieving, know that while pain may endure for the night, His Word promises for joy to come in the morning. He also promises that every tear you have sown will reap a harvest of joy. So until the morning harvest comes, let Him hold you and love you back to life.

I promise the pain won’t last forever and He is with you always.

((hugs))